After last Thursday’s adult session, looking at the return of the younger son, Karlie wrote this poem:
Cold loneliness
I have unravelled
And I try, I try
To knit a suit of armor
With these ragged cords
That could connect me to others
Warm bandage words wrap comfort around friends
But applied to contain my own pain
They shrink, thin and tangle in my trailing self
Isolated by what ifs
Reaching out is risky
I search for a way to tidy up alone
Community, family, relationship
Moth words
Eat my newest self sufficient cloak
Compassion reveals a fake shawl of pride
Real grief threads through its holes
Seen by those who trail pain too
There is no choice, again
I have to meet their eyes
Let my loss try to find theirs
As the laughter of relief empties self
Until love begins the untangling
And I unwind safely in the shelter of trust
There, friends patiently, reverently
Crochet me back into the larger warmth
Of beautiful unfinished communion
by Karlie Allaway.